Are you giving up months of planning for a small, private wedding? Congratulations! But if the thought of not being able to say your vows and walk down the aisle makes you sad, we have good news for you: Even though you’re skipping the big wedding ceremony and big reception, that doesn’t mean you can’t include some traditional wedding elements in your elopement if that’s what you want.
If you are thinking about or already planning an elopement, here are some ways to include traditional wedding elements in your ceremony.
- Vows
Vows are one of the most common parts of an elopement wedding that couples like to keep. When writing their vows, couples will get ideas from both religious and secular sources. A lot of people also hire a traditional officiant. “Use parts of your wedding that show what’s great and unique about your relationship, like what you say to each other,” says White. “Sometimes, all you have to do is work with your officiant to use traditional wedding vows.” This is true for weddings at the courthouse and at city hall as well. At city hall, a judge will walk you through a set of standard vows to make your marriage official. You can use them instead of writing your own.
- Walking Down
Why not make a big splash? Even though not all elopements have aisles, for capturing this you also can contract with some elopement photographer there’s no reason why you can’t arrive at your all-time favorite song or walk down a designated aisle. White has made an aisle out of flower petals on the beach and had brides walk down a mountain trail to their partner. “It’s part of the fun to figure out how to use a space that isn’t the norm,” says White. This is also true for an escort. Dad or another close family member or friend can still hold your arm as you walk toward the altar. After the ceremony, you and your new spouse can hold hands and walk out to a memorable song.
- A Champagne Toast
Why not make a big splash? Even though not all elopements have aisles, there’s no reason why you can’t arrive at your all-time favorite song or walk down a designated aisle. White has made an aisle out of flower petals on the beach and had brides walk down a mountain trail to their partner. “It’s part of the fun to figure out how to use a space that isn’t the norm,” says White. This is also true for an escort. Dad or another close family member or friend can still hold your arm as you walk toward the altar. After the ceremony, you and your new spouse can hold hands and walk out to a memorable song.
- First Dance
A first dance at an elopement can be just as meaningful as a first dance in front of 300 people. Even if it’s just the two of you, find a flat place close to where your ceremony is going to be. Play your favorite song—you can just play it through the speaker on your iPhone—and give each other a big hug. If you want to, you can dance in your dress. White says she has also helped couples hire a live musician, usually a guitarist or violinist, to play during the sweet moment. White says, “Don’t be afraid to be creative or to spend a lot.” “Just because you’re not having a big, traditional wedding doesn’t mean you can’t go big with some things.”
- Religious Tradition
White often works with couples who want to include a religious tradition or mix religions in their elopement ceremony, whether it’s using sacred readings, blessing the rings, or breaking the glass. “One of the best things about simply eloped is that it’s easy to include your own beliefs in your own way,” says White. Think about what your favorite traditions are and find a way to include them in your day. Some of these traditions, like passing the rings around to get blessings from each guest, work best when there are only a few people. For small weddings, it’s a breeze.